Zhengzhou Day 4: Awake!!

Good Morning,

I have been in a bit of a daze the last few days, I think.  While doing the Beijing touring, I think my body/mind thought I was on another 4-day Port Visit.... I just wasn't feeling all the choked up excitement and fear and tears that some of the other families are.  I have just felt calm, cool and collected the entire time.   Seriously, Beijing felt like a port visit.... I mean, I was tired, but you just push through that so you can see and experience all the AMAZING things of a new place.

 

Then yesterday, we flew into Zhengzhou, I really started to feel the excitement part and getting a bit choked up.   I thought I was handling it fine.... but when we received our guides Yisha and Rita handed me my update that was filled out by the foster family within the last week... WOW!!   Mom said I started getting a bit snippy in my answers to her when she was cracking jokes and questioning some things in the update.... so I guess, I am feeling just a bit more excited and overwhelmed right now than I thought.    So, I took a deep breathe, and tried to pull my "OCD/need to control the uncontrollable" side of myself up by my bootstraps and made an effort to communicate NICELY about what I needed to have happen organizing the room, putting the clothes away, getting the Gift bags and baby bag backpack ready.... and then we got along much better.   Oh, and our group went and got some lunch and I think that helped too.

 

I got everything as "Perfect" as I could and then I read email, checked Facebook and updated my blog.   That kept me up until about 11:30pm and then I CRASHED.   Then, this morning, I woke up in a DEAD PANIC.... my heart was racing, I was getting ready to yell at Mom to GET UP and I was ready to start crying.   I was looking at one side of the room and saw light and thought "OH SHIT!!! I overslept!!!"       Then I realized it was the very small hallway light I hadn't been able to figure out how to turn off last night.   (HUMPH!!!)    Then I rolled over and looked at the windows... it was still dark.   It is 4:45am and I am now... WIDE AWAKE and feeling the PANIC of HAPPINESS and EXCITEMENTS!!!  EEEAAACCCKKK!!!  

 

Oh, Goddess, please, help me control my tongue and to not unconsciously slice and dice my Mom in my excitement and FEAR as today progresses!!

Our group is meeting in the Lobby at 9:30am and taking a bus to the Civil Affairs Office to get our kids here in Zhengzhou, the capital of Henan Province.   We have 8 families getting 9 kids in our group... but their could be other families with other Agencies getting their kids today too.    We don't have a specific time we will get our kids.   While talking with Yisha last night, we found out most of our kids will be picked up from their Foster homes by the Orphanage Director/Officials this morning while enroute from the different orphanages.    So that is a new question for me to add to my list and find out later today.

 

Everything is running through my head.... will she look the same as the last pictures??  How big is she??  and on and on and on....

 

OK, I am going to TRY and get another couple of hours sleep!!