Today we had our appointment with the Pediatric Surgeon here in Missoula, Montana. She was a really nice lady, older with a wonderful British accent. I had sent her ALL the information and pictures I had been given on B'Elanna's surgery in China, and I had sent her a Bunch of questions before our appointment. She came in and started asking all sorts of questions about how B'Elanna has been doing both physically and socially since I got her. Her nurse was in the room and kept B'Elanna entertained with toys and Bubbles, so I was able to concentrate on talking with the Doctor.... and she was also able to observe how well B'Elanna moved around the room, interacted with the nurse and the toys, listen to her talk (eventually) AND observe how intelligent she is.
She and I discussed the need for a getting a genetic test done to see if there is anything else going on with B'Elanna that we can't see and isn't presenting itself. She said there really isn't a need for that. Cloaca is not a genetic disorder, but an interutero development issue and IF any of her other systems were affected... it would have presented itself already.
She educated me that with Cloaca, we also need to consult with a Urologist for all the tests that B'Elanna is going to need AND she recommended that she be sedated for most of the procedures. I told her that was perfect.... I was going to request that!!
I talked with her about these weird diapers B'Elanna keeps having.... Urine diapers that smell like stool and sometimes have a "sandy-like" substance in them. I told her I am concerned about a fistula or something. I told her (and showed a newly collected sample, hehehehe) about the dry stool diapers B'Elanna has been having... even though I am giving her the Miralax and as much apple juice and water I can get her to drink. She confirmed that she is a bit dehydrated... but that I am doing everything I can be doing. She said to keep up the Sweet Potato/Apple Juice/Water regiment I have had her on. She said I could try increasing the amount of Miralax I am giving her, it won't have any longterm negative effects on her intestinal tract and it isn't addictive... it will just help pull more water into her system.
She did her exam of B'Elanna. She explained how the her surgery would have been performed. She said she thinks she only had one surgery... where they created the Urethral opening and Anus at the same time. She said all of her orifices healed well and are a good/great size. She said there are not any external fistulas and she does not see a need any further surgery to move the anus. (I had thought it had healed to close to the vaginal opening). We discussed what I have been calling a "hemorrhoid"... she confirmed that NO it is not a hemorrhoid, but a part of the intestines that had been brought down to create the opening. She said there is nothing that can be done about it and there is a good possibility that as she grows it will "go away or be pulled back in or stay." Since she had it when I got her in China, she said B'Elanna probably had to strain during a bowel movement and that is how it got started.... just like a regular hemorrhoid.
So.... what can the Doctor do for us. Well, we have a few tests we need to get completed so we can know what is happening INSIDE B'Elanna. They gave me a kit (bag) to collect a Urine Sample... this is going to be interesting. They are scheduling a kidney ultrasound for this week or next... depending on if we need Tricare Authorizations or not. She said needs to consult with the Pediatric Urologist about the tests he would also recommend. The difficulty is he only comes to Missoula every other month and he is full for December, which means we couldn't see him until February. I said I am willing to travel to Seattle, depending on Tricare approval, to get an earlier appointment.
OK... so tests needed:
* Urine Sample
* Anesthetized Kidney/Bladder Ultrasound
* Anesthetized VCUG (Voiding Cystourethrogram)
* Anesthetized Barium Enema
* Anesthetized Spinal MRI - to look for tethered cord
The Doctor wants to try and do most of these at the same time and let me know that she would be in the hospital overnight. Once we get these tests, we will be able to determine what we need to do next.
I asked her if there is a way to test the nerve conduction, she said not really. She emphasized that to not start/push potty training right now. Her body isn't ready and until we get some of these test we can't know IF/WHEN it will be ready. She said most of these patients aren't ready until they are 4-5 years old.... but if she wants to sit on a toilet like all the other kids at the Preschool that is fine.
After the Pediatric Surgeon appointment, we had an appointment with B'Elanna's Pediatrician to get her second round of Immunizations. Poor kid go 5 shots!! Afterwards, we had to go back to the Preschool to drop off some paperwork and let the Director know some of the things the Surgeon had said. By the time we got home, B'Elanna was walking like her poor little legs were killing her. :( :( :( Needless to say, she was a bit cranky tonight and had been a bit restless and crying out tonight while she is sleeping.
UPDATED MEASUREMENTS:
Weight: 25.2 lbs (Gained 2.7 lbs since Sept. 3rd)
Height: 34 inches (Gained 0.5 inches since Sept. 3rd)
Well... off to try and collect a urine sample!!
Monday, November 19, 2012
Saturday, November 17, 2012
Love Letter: 32 Months
November 14, 2012
My Dearest B'Elanna,
This month you had A LOT of changes!! You are so much happier, sillier and more settled this month. You have had significantly LESS temper tantrums. Mostly you have started to challenge eating different foods... some days you will eat something, the next you won't. Typical 2 year old stuff.
You are laughing and giggling SO MUCH!! Life in the house this month has been a Joy. Here is a video of you at NaiNai's house. Over the last 2 months, you have gone from avoiding the Ladybug pillow, to lying on it, to jumping on it, to....
Your vocabulary is growing by leaps and bounds. So many people have been commenting on "How well you speak!!".... perfect strangers even!! There are a few sounds we are still working on, mostly anything that involves you putting your tongue on or through your teeth. I am hoping when we meet with the Developmental Assessment Team at the end of November, we can get a few sessions of Speech Therapy to help you beyond what I know how to do.
You are also able to concentrate on projects like putting puzzles together (with less frustration), you can listen to stories for a little bit longer than one month ago (you are starting to like books), and as you can see in this video your fine motor skills are even better than Gotcha Day!!
You had your first Haircut/Trim. You Did Not care for it much. You screamed and cried through most of it. Then as we were leaving... you said a VERY LOUD and Happy "Bye-Bye" and all the Beauticians laughed.
You had your First Halloween!! You were an adorable Lady Bug. You didn't go out trick-o-treating, but you really enjoyed greating people at the door and saying "Hello!! Hap Baleen!!! Bye-Bye!!"
You started a new preschool on November 1st... not by my choice... it is the only one that can receive the Military Child Care substity. They quickly made some of the same observations about you that the Pass It On Learning Preschool did.... you are very affectionate and caring towards the other children. You like to give hugs and if you think someone is upset or if you have hurt someone ... you become upset yourself and start trying to give them hugs and patting them. There are a few things about this new school that I don't like... but the Director is trying to work on getting things fixed. One of the biggest issues is that you are 2.5 years old in a classroom with 4-5 year olds, and the curriculum is SIGNIFICANTLY over your head. I feel that you have been languishing in a Daycare, when you are supposed to be learning in a Preschool. Because of this discrepancy, I have started to augment with things here at home with a YouTube Video called "Apple apple a a a" to learn the phonetic alphabet and some videos on colors and shapes that I received as an Adoption Gift.
November is National Adoption Month. You are the Purest Joy I have every brought into my life! You are so Smart and Beautiful and the lightLIGHT in each and every day and make it a pleasure to wake up every morning. This month you have started to cuddle up to at night and in the mornings you climb on top of me, give me a hug and laughing say "Good Morning!!"
I love you more and more every single day!!!
Love,
Mommy
My Dearest B'Elanna,
This month you had A LOT of changes!! You are so much happier, sillier and more settled this month. You have had significantly LESS temper tantrums. Mostly you have started to challenge eating different foods... some days you will eat something, the next you won't. Typical 2 year old stuff.
You are laughing and giggling SO MUCH!! Life in the house this month has been a Joy. Here is a video of you at NaiNai's house. Over the last 2 months, you have gone from avoiding the Ladybug pillow, to lying on it, to jumping on it, to....
Your vocabulary is growing by leaps and bounds. So many people have been commenting on "How well you speak!!".... perfect strangers even!! There are a few sounds we are still working on, mostly anything that involves you putting your tongue on or through your teeth. I am hoping when we meet with the Developmental Assessment Team at the end of November, we can get a few sessions of Speech Therapy to help you beyond what I know how to do.
You are also able to concentrate on projects like putting puzzles together (with less frustration), you can listen to stories for a little bit longer than one month ago (you are starting to like books), and as you can see in this video your fine motor skills are even better than Gotcha Day!!
You had your first Haircut/Trim. You Did Not care for it much. You screamed and cried through most of it. Then as we were leaving... you said a VERY LOUD and Happy "Bye-Bye" and all the Beauticians laughed.
You had your First Halloween!! You were an adorable Lady Bug. You didn't go out trick-o-treating, but you really enjoyed greating people at the door and saying "Hello!! Hap Baleen!!! Bye-Bye!!"
You started a new preschool on November 1st... not by my choice... it is the only one that can receive the Military Child Care substity. They quickly made some of the same observations about you that the Pass It On Learning Preschool did.... you are very affectionate and caring towards the other children. You like to give hugs and if you think someone is upset or if you have hurt someone ... you become upset yourself and start trying to give them hugs and patting them. There are a few things about this new school that I don't like... but the Director is trying to work on getting things fixed. One of the biggest issues is that you are 2.5 years old in a classroom with 4-5 year olds, and the curriculum is SIGNIFICANTLY over your head. I feel that you have been languishing in a Daycare, when you are supposed to be learning in a Preschool. Because of this discrepancy, I have started to augment with things here at home with a YouTube Video called "Apple apple a a a" to learn the phonetic alphabet and some videos on colors and shapes that I received as an Adoption Gift.
November is National Adoption Month. You are the Purest Joy I have every brought into my life! You are so Smart and Beautiful and the lightLIGHT in each and every day and make it a pleasure to wake up every morning. This month you have started to cuddle up to at night and in the mornings you climb on top of me, give me a hug and laughing say "Good Morning!!"
I love you more and more every single day!!!
Love,
Mommy
Sunday, November 4, 2012
First Concert!
Saturday, November 3, 2012
This morning B'Elanna went to her first concert... Sesame Street Live: Elmo's Super Heroes.
I believe she had a good time. Even before we made it to our seats... I was taking photos of B'Elanna on some of the local Mascot statues.
Once we made it to our seats.... little miss had a hard time sitting in the chair. It kept trying to EAT her.
After that, she spent most of the show sitting on my lap. When I was downloading the pictures is when I realized... I hadn't taken ANY pictures of the show, just of B'Elanna!!! This is the one and ONLY picture I took of the show... the empty stage!
This was her reaction when the show first started. As you can she, she wasn't sure what was happening...
Once she understoond what was happening, she started to enjoy it. Smiling, clapping, getting jiggy... even clapping when she was eating a snack.
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During the intermission, we went out and ran the hall to wear off some energy. B'Elanna also enjoyed looking at the Grizzly and the U of Montana Mascot, Monty.
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| You are BIG... |
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| What BIG TEETH you have!! |
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| Ha, Ha... you can't get me! |
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| Checking out her new toys.... |
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| Analyzing the spin!! |
Checking out her new toy at home where it is dark and she can see the lights light-up! FYI... as you can see B'Elanna was REALLY in need of a nap by the time we got home.
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
First Halloween
Today was a big day for B'Elanna. It is her FIRST Halloween... she dressed as a Ladybug!! It is also her last day at Pass It On Learning and she started at Kid Central. This is the only preschool in Missoula that the Military Child Care will substidize. This school is for 2.5 - 6 year old kids and normally they do not take kids in diapers (or they must be in the Potty-training stage), but they decided they would accept B'Elanna because of her "special circumstances" of recently adopted AND her medical condition are causing her not to be ready for potty training right now.
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| Ride'em Doggy!! |
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| Will you FINISH already!! |
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| Still won't smile when anyone but Mommy is holding the camera!! YEAH!! |
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| Horrible Picture... but the only one of the two of us. |
B'Elanna and I went trick-o-treating at a local Retirement Center with her new Preschool, and then we went back to the school and had lunch with her new class. Then the class was going down for naptime, so we left and I brought her home for her nap. During that time, I had time to reflect on our time at the school... before we go back tomorrow. Little things just kept needling me:
- All kids, no matter how young pass the standard size platters and bowls of food and serve THEMSELVES... including pouring their own glasses of milk from Pitchers. I know a lot of people are thinking... No big deal, it's good for kids to learn things, but B'Elanna has already had to learn/do TOO MANY adult things.... it is her chance turn to be a child. So, needless to say, this "server yourself" policy just does not sit right with me. I DO NOT think that a 2.5 year old should be responsible for dishing up thier own food and drinks... this is an ADULTS job.
- It was bugging me enough that I went back to the school and talked to the director. She said that according to the CACFP rules that they fall under the children are supposed to be learning to be self-sufficient while in their programs. I told the director... that phrase is upto interpretation. I interpret that to mean, a 2.5-year-old can be served their food, but be encouraged to eat with a fork and spoon and drink from a non-lidded cup. I told her, B'Elanna was already parentified in China and I DO NOT want anymore of her childhood taken from her and she needs to learn that ADULTS are here to care for HER not that she needs to RELY on herself at this stage. I told the director that I was sorry for being "That Parent" this early, but this is EXTREMELY important to me. She told me she works as an advocate for some children in the Missoula community, and she understands that I am B'Elanna's ADVOCATE. I told her EXACTLY and I didn't want to wait 6-months to find out this isn't working... if this can't be accomodated, then I wanted them to sign the form for Military Child Care telling them they couldn't accept B'Elanna and she can go back to her previous Preschool without an interuption. The director said, she thinks this can be accomodated... that she would take B'Elanna for a diaper change while the other kids are dishing up and then when she comes back to the room her plate/cup would already be ready for her. I really like this director... by the time she was done talking with me... I had really calmed down!!
- The other thing I mentioned to her was that I had noticed that A LOT of the kids in the school have Lazy Speech and I would like the Teachers to please correct B'Elanna if she starts slipping into those patterns. I also let her know that I am having B'Elanna evaluated at the end of the month at the Children's Development Center and am hoping she will be referred for Speech Therapy!
Tonight, B'Elanna loved greeting everyone at the door for Halloween. Here is a video I took of the phrases she kept saying to EVERYONE...
She is saying "Hap Baleen" for Halloween. I think it is so CUTE for a kid that just started saying the word TODAY!!
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
First Hair Cut (Trim)!!
Today B’Elanna had her First Hair Cut (Trim)!! It has been looking a bit shaggy, esp in the back. Plus, A LOT of people have mentioned recently that if I trimmed her hair it would grow faster.
She started crying as soon as they put her on the booster seat, so she sat on my lap through the hair trim.
They took off about ½ inch… hopefully her hair will grow a bit quicker now.
As they were cutting her hair, most of the hair stylists came by to see her, but she wouldn’t smile or talk to them. Then as we were walking out, she said a VERY LOUD… “BYE-BYE!!”
She started crying as soon as they put her on the booster seat, so she sat on my lap through the hair trim.
They took off about ½ inch… hopefully her hair will grow a bit quicker now.
As they were cutting her hair, most of the hair stylists came by to see her, but she wouldn’t smile or talk to them. Then as we were walking out, she said a VERY LOUD… “BYE-BYE!!”
Sunday, October 28, 2012
2 Months since Gotcha Day!!
Saturday, October 27, 2012
B'Elanna has been in my daughter and in my arms for 2 months now!! It has been quite a couple of months.
This was Gotcha Day... August 27, 2012....
She is so SMART. Somehow she knew she was supposed to be MINE and although she was stressed, confused and scared.... she still didn't want anyone else talking or trying to holding her. As you can see from this picture below, she didn't even want her Grammy talking to her. At one point, I had to hand B'Elanna to my mom for just a moment and she SCREAMED and CRIED... so she was back in my arms ASAP!! I had been having my Mom read blogs and a couple of books before we went to China, so she was prepared for whatever reaction B'Elanna had towards her on Gotcha Day... so in this picture below she is telling B'Elanna "You will like me one day!! <<smile, smile>>" As you can see, B'Elanna was not impressed!!
Now, two months later, she calls out GRAMMY when we call her, when she sees her picture on my phone and in photos around my house. B'Elanna gets REALLY excited when we Skype with my Mom and tries to kiss the screen.
B'Elanna is now smiling... even when the camera comes out!! She is joking and laughing and being funny! She is learning, learning, learning so quickly. One of her new games is to play in (or take over) my recliner when I vacate it. In these pictures, she had run-off before I could get her PJ's on one night.
Just this last week, she has been wanting her soft horsey that her NaiNai gave her when she arrived in America. She is keeping her blanket on her when she first goes to bed/sleep... kicks it off later at night while she is sleeping... but she is starting with a BLANKET!! She has also started to play with her stuffed dolls and her puzzles. Here are a couple of pictures from today... as you can see in the puzzle picture... she still likes to put things in lines.
B'Elanna has been in my daughter and in my arms for 2 months now!! It has been quite a couple of months.
This was Gotcha Day... August 27, 2012....
Now, two months later, she calls out GRAMMY when we call her, when she sees her picture on my phone and in photos around my house. B'Elanna gets REALLY excited when we Skype with my Mom and tries to kiss the screen.
B'Elanna is now smiling... even when the camera comes out!! She is joking and laughing and being funny! She is learning, learning, learning so quickly. One of her new games is to play in (or take over) my recliner when I vacate it. In these pictures, she had run-off before I could get her PJ's on one night.
Just this last week, she has been wanting her soft horsey that her NaiNai gave her when she arrived in America. She is keeping her blanket on her when she first goes to bed/sleep... kicks it off later at night while she is sleeping... but she is starting with a BLANKET!! She has also started to play with her stuffed dolls and her puzzles. Here are a couple of pictures from today... as you can see in the puzzle picture... she still likes to put things in lines.
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Citizenship!!
Today we got home to find B'Elanna's CERTIFICATE OF CITIZENSHIP in the mailbox!!!! She couldn't care less... but I was estatic!! It took everything I could think of to get a couple of pictures of her with the certificate without her bending or ripping it. I finally resorted to giving her my cell phone.
Now I can apply for her Social Security Card and Passport!!!
Love Letter: 31 months
Sunday, October 14, 2012
My Dear B'Elanna,
This month has brought a HUGE amount of changes for you. You are now fully immersed in the English language. You are in your new home here in Missoula, MT. You have only ME around... for better or worse... for boring and fun!! You started preschool.
This has been a difficult month for us. We have Butted heads, over and over and over. Your pesonality is so very similar to my own (according to family). You are very stubborn and defiant. You are cooperative and sweet and shy. AND THEN something will set you off and you will cry and scream and reject Me, Posideon and any soothing I can hope to give you. Being the adult, and all the reading/research I have done, I know this is normal... but honestly, many times my feelings have been Hurt and I get angry... and I let you know. I have put you in Time-in, put you in your crib and walked out to the room to the hallway until you have finished your tantrum, I have used a VERY stern and ANGRY voice towards you. BUT... we are learning. Your vocabulary is growing by Leaps and Bounds, both verbal and sign language from the Baby Signing videos. Our patience for each other takes two steps forward/three steps back... but in just the last week.... I feel like we ran a mile ahead after having taken a full 10 steps backwards.
You started the Pass It On Learning Preschool. We did a couple of Orientation days and on October 1st you started full time... and I went back to Work. It is a WONDERFUL school... and you are the apple of your teachers eye. They tell me that you laugh and joke, help and sooth the other children, you sit in a chair at the table and eat A LOT every day. All of these things are Wonderful to hear, but at the same time, very frustrating. It is like you are a Dr. Jekel/Mr. Hyde. The nice, sweet one at the school... and the mean, rotten one at home. I know, the school is an environment that you are familiar with and comfortable in. And, I know, you have realized you are in a NEW home and are testing your boundries with me. I hope you will learn soon that you will be staying with me FOREVER, although I know that can take years. Since you were in your Foster Home for 8 months.... I am guessing the earliest you will finally realize I am your Forever Mommy will be at least 12 months. But things are getting better and better... especially this Last Week!!
This month, we also went to Kalispell twice to visit Tante Noonie and NaiNai. You have gotten MANY new toys. You especially like your riding toy. In fact, sometimes... you won't let it go.
You also experienced your first Pumpkin Patch. I think you had a Great Time.
Some things I have learned about you:
My Dear B'Elanna,
This month has brought a HUGE amount of changes for you. You are now fully immersed in the English language. You are in your new home here in Missoula, MT. You have only ME around... for better or worse... for boring and fun!! You started preschool.
This has been a difficult month for us. We have Butted heads, over and over and over. Your pesonality is so very similar to my own (according to family). You are very stubborn and defiant. You are cooperative and sweet and shy. AND THEN something will set you off and you will cry and scream and reject Me, Posideon and any soothing I can hope to give you. Being the adult, and all the reading/research I have done, I know this is normal... but honestly, many times my feelings have been Hurt and I get angry... and I let you know. I have put you in Time-in, put you in your crib and walked out to the room to the hallway until you have finished your tantrum, I have used a VERY stern and ANGRY voice towards you. BUT... we are learning. Your vocabulary is growing by Leaps and Bounds, both verbal and sign language from the Baby Signing videos. Our patience for each other takes two steps forward/three steps back... but in just the last week.... I feel like we ran a mile ahead after having taken a full 10 steps backwards.
You started the Pass It On Learning Preschool. We did a couple of Orientation days and on October 1st you started full time... and I went back to Work. It is a WONDERFUL school... and you are the apple of your teachers eye. They tell me that you laugh and joke, help and sooth the other children, you sit in a chair at the table and eat A LOT every day. All of these things are Wonderful to hear, but at the same time, very frustrating. It is like you are a Dr. Jekel/Mr. Hyde. The nice, sweet one at the school... and the mean, rotten one at home. I know, the school is an environment that you are familiar with and comfortable in. And, I know, you have realized you are in a NEW home and are testing your boundries with me. I hope you will learn soon that you will be staying with me FOREVER, although I know that can take years. Since you were in your Foster Home for 8 months.... I am guessing the earliest you will finally realize I am your Forever Mommy will be at least 12 months. But things are getting better and better... especially this Last Week!!
This month, we also went to Kalispell twice to visit Tante Noonie and NaiNai. You have gotten MANY new toys. You especially like your riding toy. In fact, sometimes... you won't let it go.
You also experienced your first Pumpkin Patch. I think you had a Great Time.
Some things I have learned about you:
- Your FAVORITE colors are Green and Pink!!
- Your favorite sign language sign is Socks. You also know and use milk, coat, water, MORE, food/eat.
- You HATE chocolate.
- You still LOVE noodles.
- You still like eggs, yogurt and bananas, just like in China. Now you also like milk and apple juice.
- You tried asparagus this month... I think you liked it. You also tried avacado... You didn't care for it. You ate some artichoke hearts I had from Costco.... You LOVED them!!!
- You are learning to understand English VERY Quickly and your verbal skills are coming along quicker than I could have imagined.
- You are picking up Sign Language VERY Quickly also.
- You LOVE Posideon and say "Posideon, Posideon, Posideon" as we are leaving the preschool Every Day!! You are also TERRIFIED of him when he First comes in the house, because he is So Happy and Energetic... he almost tramples you and Hits you with his big tail...if you are on the floor. So...Usually, you come RUNNING for me to pick you up before I can open the door to let him in, then you scream or laugh (depending on your mood) when he puts his big nose on your foot.
- All your initial blood work for Lead, diseases, worms and parasites... came back negative or normal. You are a healthy little girl. We also restarted ALL of your immunizations this month.
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